ADHD parents and stories


The topic of ADHD may bring out strong feelings and opinions from your friends and family. Critics may make bitter accusations. The fact is: Science is on your side.


ADHD on Trial

Even when presented with scientific support for the existence of ADHD, evidence doesn't win over all the skeptics.

Some will change.

  • People who really want to support you, but who have some doubts or questions, may change. A good answer is all they need

Some will not change.

  • Some of those who are still skeptical want more evidence. That's wonderful. You can look at many scientific studies together
  • Other skeptics have made a battle of it. You need answers to stand by your own decisions and remain firm and calm. They may never budge
  • What is important is that you need to remain confident in yourself about the decision you and the doctor have made

Now imagine a courtroom trial. ADHD is “the accused.” You are the defense lawyer. What can you say back to each of the following attacks? Suggestions are under each accusation.

ADHD is not real the way diabetes is real.

  • ADHD is real in at least one way that diabetes is real: it’s normal for everybody to have the symptoms from time to time. Every child’s blood sugar spikes up sometimes. Every child is inattentive, hyperactive or impulsive sometimes. But when the symptom is frequent, persistent and severe, then it might be ADHD, a real disorder.

Bad teachers cause ADHD. Their lessons are boring and rote. Healthy, intelligent children should rebel!

  • If a child is inattentive, impulsive and/or hyperactive only at school, the child's behavior would not match the criteria for a diagnosis of ADHD. A diagnosis of ADHD is based partially on symptoms appearing in more than one place. Look again at the list of criteria

Bad parents cause ADHD. They let their children get away with too much!

  • No one, not even the most brilliant scientist in the world, knows for certain what causes ADHD. For anyone to claim that they know “bad parents cause ADHD” is simply unscientific. They have no proof. Underneath, what skeptics are really saying is the same old accusation that ADHD isn’t a real disorder.

The name for this disorder has changed so many times it can’t possibly be a real disease.

  • In fact, the name hasn’t changed all that much. It began as Attention Deficit Disorder. It has become Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, officially written AD/HD. The disorder has been characterized by “attention deficits” all along. Scientists have identified three subtypes of the disorder: inattentive, hyperactive-impulsive and combined

ADHD can’t be a real disorder. Hyperactivity and inattention are not the same thing.

  • Real disorders can have different forms. Two different types of symptoms coming from the same source is sometimes the way the body works: For example, fever and chills are different, but they both can come from having the flu. Hyperactivity and inattention are different, but they reflect the same underlying disorder

Doctors today are in the pharmaceutical companies' pockets. You can't trust them.

  • If you are not comfortable with a medical doctor, medical doctors are not the only experts you can consult about ADHD. Psychologists and certain other health care professionals can make a diagnosis, but do not write prescriptions. Find help choosing a health care professional

Anything having to do with psychology is not real science.

  • What is real science? It's a process: performing careful, controlled studies and collecting evidence that confirms or disproves theories. The scientific process is the same whether the field is physics, chemistry or psychology

Drugs turn children into zombies.

  • Medicines for ADHD are prescribed to help manage your child’s symptoms. If a child seems unfeeling and uncaring when taking ADHD medication, then the family should return to the doctor immediately to evaluate the medicine and dosage

Being impulsive, daydreaming, and starting things you don't finish are normal kid behaviors.

  • It's a matter of knowing “how much” is too much
    • Being active might be popping out of your seat
    • Hyperactive might be unable to stay in your seat long enough even to finish an assignment
    • Ordinary distraction might be hardly working at all on a weekend chore in order to splash in a puddle
    • Too much distraction might be hardly working at all on an arithmetic test in order to stare out the window
    • Ordinary impulsive behavior might be interrupting occasionally
    • Too impulsive might be interrupting constantly
  • It’s not easy to know where the line is when some becomes too much. That’s one reason a professional, who studies what “normal kid behavior” is, has to make the diagnosis.

Why do these doctors change their minds about which medicine is the right one and what is the right dose? Something that’s trial and error cannot be scientific.

  • What seems like “trial and error” on the doctor’s part is not random. The doctor knows there is a small number of possible medicines and the outcomes to watch for. Starting carefully with a small dose and changing if the results aren’t controlling the symptoms, or if the side effects are not tolerated, is good medicine: it’s called titration
  • Think about how often you change cold medications or over-the-counter pain medications before you settle on one that works best for you. How a medication works can be different for every person; prescription medications are no exception

You can't give a child a drug with side effects.

  • All medicines may have side effects, even medicines for asthma, ear infections or diabetes. The doctor can tell you what side effects to watch for and will welcome your help in being alert to all changes in your child as you try a new medication or a new dose as part of continuing care
  • Whenever anyone needs any type of medication, it’s a good idea to learn about side effects in order to plan for and manage them well

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